an invitation & a request

Chris and I married on the two year anniversary of our first date.

It sounds romantic until you know that our first date was to Subway and I’m pretty sure I paid. Let’s just say that Chris Graham was a *little* rough around the edges when I first got him, and I was a very patient, loving woman. (Just kidding, that’s not true at all. I was bossy and probably a little loud-mouthed but I had a hardcore crush so it can be excused. Sort of…)

One of the things I have on my never-ending list of things to write about is a few posts on Chris and I before we were married. Not because of nostalgia so much, but because there are so many lessons other dumb people in love could learn from us that I feel like I need to write about it eventually. I find it’s easy–once you’re married–to forget the weird dating stuff and the heartache that can come along with singleness and I don’t want to pretend that didn’t happen. Because it did, oh my goodness, it did.

But that’s on a list of about 112 other things I have knocking around my little brain to write about some day, and I don’t know when that will actually happen. I know that people say marriage is hard, but getting to the marriage part can be hard too. Just in different ways.

Either way, I’m super thankful that I married Christopher Graham because I hate plunging toilets and taking out the garbage and who would do that if he wasn’t around? Also, I hate putting my phone on the charger at night and rolling over to turn off the lamp after I’m done reading so I’m glad he’s around because I get to just place my phone and book on his pillow and then he’ll put them up and turn the light off when he comes to bed.

(I keep rereading that last [really long] sentence and laughing at how ridiculous I just made myself sound, like I’m too lazy to roll over and turn off the light at night, but it’s completely true and I’m leaving it. Some people ask me how I juggle so much and the answer is, I don’t actually. I can’t even plug my phone into the charger at night or turn the lamp off. I am helpless and lazy.)

So without Chris, I would have a completely dead phone and a huge electric bill.

Again, I’m really thankful for Chris. I think sometimes it seems that I share only the crappy parts of our lives and I don’t want to forget that there’s lots of good too. And not just because he’s super cute, but because I think the people we are becoming–almost nine years into marriage–are not too shabby. It was touch and go there for a minute, but we seem to be on the up and up.

Recently, our church interviewed us for a sermon series on how God transforms our lives through being in the Bible. Some people came to our house and filmed us as we shared a little of our journey, and I’d love for you to check it out if you want. You get to hear me say words instead of just type them (GULP) and then I cry for you which isn’t weird or uncomfortable at all.

Here’s the video.

Speaking of crying, tonight I get to share a part of our story at a conference on the south side of Indianapolis. If you’re in the area or want to join us, I’d love to see you there. The conference lasts two days and I’ll be around on Friday night. I attended last year and was blown away by the worship and teaching. It’s not too late to join us! Go here for all the details.

Okay, that was the invitation. Now can I ask for your prayers as I share tonight too? I feel prepared, but if I think too long about what I’m getting ready to do, I feel like throwing up just a little bit. Speaking in front of middle schoolers all day is no problem, but adults? Yikes. The title of my talk is “Beauty from Ashes” and I get to share about the destruction of our marriage and then the beautiful rebuilding that God allowed. I’m hoping his grace and mercy shine through and I don’t just become a blubbering fool.

Because it has been known to happen.

One more story about how lazy I am and then I’ll go. One time when I was freezing cold and piled under fifteen blankets in bed, I realized my lips were slightly chapped and I needed some chapstick. But it was just too cold to move (You’ve been there, right? Too cold to move? This happens in Indiana for about five months straight.) and so I called to my lovely husband while he was in the other room watching TV and he came to see what was wrong. I told him I was in need of some chapstick but too cold to move and then asked him if he could bring me some. He rolled his eyes but acquiesced. Once he returned, I turned on the whiny-baby charm hardcore and asked him if he would put the chapstick ON my lips because it was just that cold and I just COULD NOT move.

Because my husband is loving and kind and very patient, he then put chapstick on my lips for me. Even though I was completely capable of putting it on myself. All because I was cold.

Again, I’m a lazy turd and my husband is way too nice to me.

Happy Friday and talk to you soon–Mary