celebrating three years.

They all gathered to celebrate Chris. His being clean. His three years.

And while not all of these people knew, in the beginning, of his journey, they all came to know.

In the beginning, it was a secret. A shame. It hurt to say it out loud and to look people in the eye. What a lie we had been living. And even though I didn’t know it was all a lie, I still felt a part of the deceit.

But these people that gathered to support Chris, to support us, they helped and encouraged us along the way whether they knew it or not. Sometimes it was just in a passing conversation where we got to talk about everyday things. When talking about simple things was a luxury. Or maybe they knew and they let us bring it up and rage or keep it to ourselves and try to talk and think about other things.

Addiction is consuming even when you try to not let it be. It never leaves you even if it seems quiet at the moment.

So we celebrated three years of battling. Three years of support and encouragement and love and prayers.

I can remember intensely those first few weeks, but in the same breath, it seems a lifetime ago.

I’m learning that’s how life is: blasts of intense emotions and calming lulls.

And right now, I’m thankful for the lull.