(pants: Old Navy [first worn here], flannel: thrifted, sweater: Old Navy, flats: Target)
These pictures aren’t good.
That’s not really the point of this post.
But it does sum up my life right now: leaving for work before the sun comes up, getting home after it sets (hence, the indoor pictures), children that just want to cling to me when I finally get home, and a cute puppy that is waiting for me to bend down so he can French kiss me. He’s very affectionate…and gross.
I’m pretty back and forth about wanting to work full time or stay at home with my kids. It really depends on the day, moment, and, sometimes, the second.
But right now, while things are so busy–too busy, really–I wish I was just at home. Wearing PJs, wondering what I’ll make the girls for lunch, annoyed with the dog, avoiding laundry, just being home and with my kids.
I miss them a lot right now.
I’ve always over-committed myself, but as my kids grow, I’m realizing more and more what that does to them. And I’m not happy about it.
So I’m working on doing less. That’s part of my desire for a career change–I want to focus more on my kids and less on other people’s. It’s also a goal for 2013–to slow down, to say no to others more often.
There’s lots of things I’m not sure about, but the importance of my kids isn’t one of them.
I’m just worried that right now, they don’t know that.
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Speaking of kids, how/when do you discipline yours? Mama Marchand and friends have an interesting series going on right now and it’s definitely starting some conversations. Go over and add your two cents!
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Come back later today for an awesome giveaway! Books, books for everyone!!
Mary,
I understand your dilemma. I know so many teachers who have gone through the same thoughts/feelings. Have you ever considered teaching at a virtual school? My cousin teaches for the Georgia cyber academy. She does have to send the youngest to half day preschool because it does require devotion while you’re on the clock, but with Chris home it might be something to consider. She said she would never leave the house to work again. Also, my niece is a competitive gymnast and some of her teammates take online school to keep up with their Olympic-like dream. I’ll keep you in my prayers.
Sarah Kim
Mary,
I know someone who teaches online as well! She is a SAHM and she makes a good living and has good insurance. You may want to look into it and I am happy to give you her info! You could reach out to her via FB!
Also, I have struggled w/ this to almost the point of depression. It took me almost a year after Owen was born to FINALLY accept I was a working mom. When I would call my parents to check up on him and hear his voice in the background, I immediately would start to cry and had to get off the phone. The time you spend w/ your kids is special, and they know that…you can’t hide love, especially to your children. I agree w/ fewer commitments in 2013 to make YOU happier. Your kids are not suffering at all from you working! My dad used to travel A LOT when I was little and I don’t remember that at all, but I do remember him being at ALL of my games. Truthfully, I don’t remember much at all about my mom being home w/ us as kids. As long as they know they’re your #1 and when you are w/ them, you give them your attention/love…that’s what they’ll remember.
Hang in there! 🙂
Andrea Herron Williams
PS Sorry for the long response, I just know exactly how you feel!
It IS tough. Me staying home just wasn’t an option. I am thankful that I didn’t have a whole lot of guilt over that, from a selfish point of view, because guilt stinks. What a great idea to teach online! I would never have thought of that. I think each parent has to choose what is best for them and for their family – but I have to say, I am very grateful for the teachers my boys had in both grade school and high school that made an impact on them, some of whom were parents with young children. I can appreciate how difficult that must have been at times for them to devote all that energy and love to other peoples kids. And you are coaching also, right? Talk about a time suck – though certainly you are making an impact on those kids – and I hope their parents are appreciative!
I have been battling this for all 10 years of my daughter’s life. Looking back, I don’t regret working but for most of it, I have been able to work from home.
I can say that working does make me appreciate our time we do have more. I find that when I’m off, I don’t particularly spend MORE quality time with them, just am around and available. If I had my pick, I’d stay home but you can definitely be successful as a working mother.
Also, your shoes are adorable 🙂
Disciplining my kids is HARD! I have Memphis, who is autistic, and has to be dealt with a certain way… and then Ruby, who is not, and has to be disciplined another way. ‘sigh’
Heading over there know to check it out!
The only time I get uninterupted time to take pics, is if I manage to do them when I go home for lunch… I feel ya!
You look great!! Love the shoes!